Saturday, December 31, 2011

Dropping Science in the Redwoods

So here it is the last day of the new year.  I am glad; 2011 was truly a pretty shitty year as far as my life has gone so far.  I could tell you all the gory details but I won't do that to you.  What I am gonna drop on you is a sort a full circle type thing.  In that other blog I penned, the one that had 3 awesome numbers in the title, I opined often about the sad state of affairs it is out their regarding, um, yeah, WAVING amongst road cyclists.  I wave to everyone: the weekend warrior, the geriatric, the mountain bikers, the roadies and the racers.  Why? Because we all have one thing in common; we like to ride a bicycle - okay we have 2 things in common - after eating asparagus our pee smells the same - but what I was getting at is that I wave to everyone.  There is only one type of rider that doesn't wave back - the dude who THINKS he is fast.  Dude, you are not fast.  Seriously.  And you give cyclists a bad name.  I tested this theory today and after finding the douche who thinks he is fast and having him not wave back I rounded the corner and ran across the euro pro on the Liquigas team out for a nice west Marin training ride.  I waved to him and shot me this handsome Italian grin and big 'ole wave and, in doing this, solidified my theory that the only douche bag that doesn't wave is douche that THINKS he is fast, cause if you know you are fast, or even slow for that matter, why wouldn't you wave.  Guess the only real reason is that you are a douche ....... bag.


Happy New Year!

May 2012 Kick Fucking Ass!

Wednesday, December 28, 2011

Say Whaaaaaaaaaaa?

What?  What's that you say?  You say today is a crappy day?   Well, not really.  I rode today for the first time since 12/23.  I also got my magic elixir prescription filled and one under the tongue and am already feeling about 10%.  But, and there is always a but, I did get a ride in.  Actually, gonna ride the trainer til Saturday and then try to log some long and super slow miles this weekend.  Winter is here and it is time to, since I must, clock some base and try to get my sorry ass ready for next year.  I am so looking forward to healing and logging some pain free miles so I am in no hurry to get out and do anything at effort until the healing process has concluded; tried to rush things once already and now I am set back ... not all the way back, so I have that going for me which is nice.

On a different note ... I made some slow cooker beef barbacoa (not the brains kind) and it came out absofuckinglutely scrumptious.  I have been eating it over lettuce with avocado, over brussel sprouts, broccoli, cabbage and loaded with hot sauce and whatever else grabs me by the short hairs at the time.  And I am still reading The Magus (it is 700 pps long) and it is quite the best fiction novel I have ever read .... maybe.  Not done yet.

Well ... that's all I got now ....


Friday, December 23, 2011

Done Blowed My Shit Up........Again

I just wrote an awesome post but for some reason Google can't handle it if you have more than 1 gmail account so you guys get fucked.  There is no way I feel like trying to can't recreate that kind of freshnesss.  Fuck it.  I blew my feet up riding the MTB.  Learned my lesson.  Happy holidays.


Saturday, December 17, 2011

It Smells Like Hero Dirt

Hero Dirt - know it?  It's the phenomena when there is just enough moisture to keep the trails tacky like velcro but it lacks the slop of makes you fell like a fucking Super Hero because you can rail it so hard.  I love hero dirt.  Sometimes I even wear my cape.  I rode Tam last weekend with a whole posse of TL kids and it was wicked good time.  I had no idea how much I was missing the dirt because of my busted ole dogs.  They be feeling better a bit and after today's road sojourn way out west, manana, the days after today, shall see me riding said dirt in an effort to paste a perma-grin across my ugly ole mug, capice?  'Cause you see, I am back on track, back on the diet, the program, the lifestyle of a cyclist/pretend bike racer in his early forties who works 10 hours a day, has a wife, 2 kids, a dog, a cat, 2 hamsters and a penchant for things not-so-good-for-him.  You may want to check back and see how all that goes.  I tend to do things the hard way. Might be fun.


Saturday, December 10, 2011

My Backyard

This dude straight shreds.  I need to get out on the MTB - pain or no pain.



Definition of FRUSTRATION
1: the act of frustrating

2 a: the state or an instance of being frustrated
b: a deep chronic sense or state of insecurity and dissatisfaction arising from unresolved problems or                                          unfulfilled needs

You feel me?

It is a horrible thing to feel your fitness slip through your fingers like trying to keep a cup of motor oil in your palm.  I am riding, sometimes the same rides I trained on when fit, but, and there is always a but, I am having to ride a few cogs easier and it is still an effort.  There is still pain.  I cannot ride out of the saddle.  And riding more than a couple of days out on the road causes me much discomfort.  So this is what I have been doing for the rebab: 1 day out on the road 1.5-2.5 hours slow and low, 1 day on the trainer with a wicked spin but in a super easy gear - 45 mins-1 hour, rinse, repeat.  And while my weigh has not shot up a lot (only 8 lbs) my fitness is dwindling faster than a bag of weed at an Occupy Anything rally (what a bunch of retards those folk are, ehhhhh) but I diarrhea.....mean digress.  So it pains me to see my best fitness in years get hamstrung by injury, but I am old as fuck so it sort of stands to reason that I need to be careful.  Fuck that.  I am anything but careful.  So what am I gonna do?  I am gonna try to get 50 or 60 in on the road bike today and see what happens.  One-step-forward-two-steps-back-bitches.  That's me "old hard way" as Agro sometimes calls me.  I will let you know if I blow myself up.  With that I am going to leave you with 2 images: first is a race video that purddy much sums up why I race cross and the other is just hot.  Wanna hear it, here it go:

Sunday, December 4, 2011


It's fairly early and it's damn cold.  I got out for a short ride yesterday and the bottom bracket on The Good Wife started screaming at me like The Other Wife so I popped on over Summit Bikes and the cat there took care of her for me.  By the way, Summit is my new bike shop of choice.  They have been nothing but cool and done nothing but extremely good work for me.  As you were.  Today we have my momma and step pops staying with us for a few days cause a water pipe broke at there place and the water wings they had had holes in them.  So we gots a few peeps in the house.  Guess today is gonna be a long slow one.  Oh, and get tootsies are feeling a lot better.  Seriously.  They are not better, just feeling better.  With this I bid you adieu.  

Friday, December 2, 2011

So Doped Up

I saw the good doctor today and it was with some alacrity that he diagnosed my right foot - a Taylor's Bunion.  Yup.  A fucking bunion.  The other doctors could not figure that one out.  Now the left foot, that took a little doing.  He took some more X-Rays and noticed what appears to be a genetic mishap called Hallux Limitus where the ligaments are attached too close to the bone and I do not have the ability to flex my toe back - hyper extend so to speak; which is what I did by overcompensating for my bunion, that and sprain everything trying to race on it.  This just makes me feel old.  Oh, well.  He said with the right extra special secret potion that I had to go into a bad neighborhood and pick up from the Apothecary I should be just fine.  The good doctor gave me some other good dope and told me I could ride just not run, jump, kick, bitch, moan -  you get the point.  So, here I sit loaded to the gills on pills and watching football after a sweet, almost rejuvenated ride in the odd but 80 degree day we had here today.  December 2nd and 80 degrees.  Gotta love that.  

Enjoy your weekend.  I intend to.  Gonna ride the road tomorrow and I may, may, even get out Sunday on the MTB and give the Three Mother Fuckers a go (picture above) - slow and low, still cannot stand and climb out of the saddle for the pain.  But, and there is always a but, the good Doctor said, when I asked him if I should be riding, replied: "Sure, you can even ride your MTB if it has shocks."  So, you know what, it does and I might.


Humorous anecdote: Upon meeting the new doctor I was spewing all kinds of self prognosis that I had procured on the intrawebs, and he looked at me and said, and I quote, "Kid, Stay off the internet.  Or surf porn."  Bazinga!

Thursday, December 1, 2011

Black Mountain Hop

Now that is a bike lane, eh?  Same width as the fucking road.  That's the shit I am talking about, yo.  As you were.  And how about that view.  I sure dig riding my bicycle.  I am off to see the next doctor tomorrow.  This ought to be good.  

Weekly rant: why in the fuck does every driver stopped at a T shaped intersection look right first when the most immediate traffic concern comes from the left....ALWAYS.  I bet you do it too.  Shame on you.  Sometimes I am surprised that I am surprised that people are so, um, well, dumb.  Check the idiots at the stop signs looking right next time.  Check yo self as well.


Sunday, November 27, 2011

Gettin' Chilly - On to the 4th Dr.

Well, my fearless friends, I am off to the 4th Dr this week.  Hopefully this cat can kindly coerce whatever is in me out......of my foot that is.  Since my racing season was cut short or off for that matter, I am longing for the mountain bike, some singletrack, and some deep breathing exercises.  Hopefully on Friday we will know what is wrong and I can begin the road to recovery.   January 1st has a lot in store for me.  I have a new set of goals and what I believe are the means to achieve them.  Really, 365 days is not that many to be dedicated when one looks at the grand scheme of the fact that I have been on this Big Blue Marble somewhere in the neighborhood of 15,330 days.  Shit, I have even penned my 2012 manifesto and it may be as grand as Dostoevsky's Notes From the Underground.   There is only one way to tell and that is to heal and implement said manifesto with, um, gusto.  Off for a spin.  Out!

Sunday, November 20, 2011

Who Says Cycling Ain't Sexy

The picture above is from the CyclePassions 2012 calender.  She is French. She is young.  She is hot.  She races 'cross.  Her name is Pauline Ferrand Prevot.  She deserves your attention.  She deserves equal prize money.  She deserves to start later in the day.  She deserves everything a man deserves.  As do all the other ladies out there, the ladies that can bury every last one of you reading this shit ass blog.  Me too.  Well, maybe.  

Singlespped World Champs at Golden Gate Park today.  Perfect weather.  Long shot call for the win - Derek Yarra.  Local boy makes good?  We shall see.   

Saturday, November 12, 2011

Thank You, Pretty Lady

So my Ninja skills of mind over matter are working and my sore ass feet are feeling better.  My left foot is 90% better and my right foot has seen the swelling drop an amazing 60% - and I rode out to Rancho Nicasio on Thursday in the biting crisp Fall air at about 80% effort with little to no pain.  We had rain yesterday so I took an easy spin on the trainer in the man cave for 45 mins but, and there is always a but, I will not bore you with trainer talk; today is about hot ladies in cars.  Sooooooooo, on my way back up and over LVR Thursday I passed the entrance to Lucas Ranch and as fate would have it a smoking hot person of the sex opposite me was coming out.  We made eye contact and, yup, she looked me up and down like a big ole stinky steak.......and........I liked it.  She even licked her chops a little bit.  Now I am no stranger to being pursued by women, they seem to like me A-OK.  I, for the obvious reasons, cracked a big ole smile after the chop licking incident and she, well, she smiled this demure and slightly embarassed smile that fairly screamed, "damn, he caught me and I don't care".  This, Lady Friend, made my day and I want to thank you for the ego boost.  Your timing could not have been better.  So remember when you make eye contact with someone smile.  I know this sounds sort of sappy but it's hella true - smile and you could make someone's day.  She did mine.  And it carries over.  Ladies in my building and at the coffee shop and everywhere started checking me out as well.  Why?  Well, because I am hot (laughing now)........actually, as many of you know being mentally fit can take you to the 90th percentile in any sport - it's the last 10% that rely on skill - even in the ways of the opposite sex.  So know that you are able and you will.................

Saturday, November 5, 2011


Life has been giving IT to me in the 2 hole........dry..........for the last 6 weeks.  I finally found a little fitness and not by accident, mind you.  And then my foot blows up.  Still have no idea - Dr appointment with the ortho Weds.  We shall see.  The Tranny on my Ford blew up and needs to be replaced - $4000.00 how you doin'.  The Spawn's football team has yet another playoff game and while I am proud of him, I am pissed that the season is so long; though in hindsight it really doesn't matter much cause my foot is toast.  Iam sick and have been.   Lost my fitness.  But I must say things are looking up.  I don't really think they can get much lower.  I been down so godamn long, that it looks like up to me.  I did catch this rat that has been haunting our pantry, killed it dead (pic to follow). 

Our stupid ass cat came face-to-face with the sucker and could do no damage.  Never send a pussy to do a man's job.  Ehhhh?  Ehhhh?  Weakness.  Anyway - off to hobble around.  This 'cross season looks done for the year.  Pisses me off.  Back to slow and low and long.  See you out there.

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Modder Haan Racing Kit in the Works

The new kit will have the same color scheme but with the Rooster logo and some cool block lettering.  I am almost there in the design and then I need to drop the credit card on the folks at Champ-Sys and get the proof and viola.......we have kit. 

Sorry, I have been lax in posting lately.  I am racing next weekend with or with out the pain so there will be more activity on this site.  Peace.  Eat, drink, and beat Larry.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011


Yup, me and la doctora had a visit today.  She was kind.  Nothing broken or dislocated.  Still no idea what is wrong but who gives a shit.  Back on the bike tomorrow.  Ain't nothing but a little pain.  "Cross is pain.  Taking the rest of the week easy on the bike; some long slow road spins are in order to make sure I don't eff up the appendage some more.  Then back after it next week.  I do hate missing the SCX#3 race where I sit in 7th place overall, but they trow out the 2 worst of 8 races and count the top 6 so this weekend with be the first truly bad finish for the series.  Then next week we are off to Surf City if the Spawn's football team misses the playoffs.  2-7 should do that just fine but one never knows.  Well, I hope y'all are well and riding and quaffing some suds.  Peace be with you.  Out for now.

Sunday, October 16, 2011

Adding Insult to Injury

Well, things sure look a little bit different from my perspective.  We went to CCCX #4 this morning.  I raced, even after the EMT that looked at my foot said, "Dude, can you really walk on that.  It's deforemed."  Well, it started out fine, I was just riding along in the front of the group for 2 plus laps and the run up with the barrier, on my third pass, was too much for whatever is jacked in my foot.  It hurts.  This week will be a rest week.  Momo, though, took 3rd in the juniors and straight represented.  Way to go, Mo.