Monday, May 28, 2012

Happy Memorial Day

Let's try to keep the faceplants to a minimum today, ehhhh...

Out (Riding)!

Sunday, May 27, 2012

Sunday Is a Day of Worship

After a short solo jaunt on the road me and the spawn decided, now that 'cross season is sneaking up on us, that we ought to get out on said vehicles of choice for a little local and mountainous shred.  Up we went and crossed the path of some old school cycling fauna.  We saw Sean of SOULCRAFT and he was riding with two other cats one of which was Stevil from ALL HAIL THE BLACK MARKET on their way to sample some of the newer, more improved local singletrack.  Hope you guys had a good ride.  My kid was stoked to meet y'all.  He was stoked to meet some of the upper crust (maybe more crust than upper - I joke - sort of) of the cycling community that he now feels a part of in large part to his attending and racing 'cross with his old man.  If you have not taken your young'un(s) out to the races I highly recommend that you do for bonding sake. It really worked for us.  Well,  off to suck down my second NA beer.  Really?  I suck.


Saturday, May 26, 2012


I so bonked today.  Met up with one of the boys and decided to check out the Roasters Ride.  Dang.  I got popped off the back on the first climb.  Did I give up?  Hells no.  I dug......straight through my breakfast.  I worked with this gal, yup, she smoked me, until I got caught by these 2 nice guys that I met pre-ride and they dragged me to the Bovine where I caught up, unfortunately, with the rest of the gang.  Down Highway 1 up BoFax?  Sure.  Why not.  I ate a hard candy and said fuck it.  What a dumb ass.  But I guess we need "those" rides every now and then to realize that if you are trying to ride hard, fast, train, far, or with any kind of state of mind outside of a Sunday church spin ....  PACK SOME FOOD OR CASH.  I had neither.  So up from Bolinas, after getting dropped again on Hwy 1, the 3 waited for me, again, and up we go.  I had 1 gear and it was not on my bike.  I bummed a GU.  Helped.  But then we started the next climb up from Alpine Dam and I swear I had a mini-stoke.  The smells coming off of me reminded me of the Wilda-beast pen at the zoo.  My right eye started drooping, and the pavement started swirling like I had peaked after some seriously potent Magic Mushrooms only nowhere near as fun.  I stunk, sucked, suffered and swore.  I made it.  Barely.  Then I had to borrow some cash.  A Snickers and a banana never tasted so good.  Then I limped home and Fawn Dr. kicked the ever living shit out of me.  So all in I, I can't really say rode, buti limped 60 miles, climbed 5500 feet, used up 2800 calories and borrows a GU and $2.  The only thing I didn't do was shit myself .....  wait ...... scratch that last one.


Sunday, May 20, 2012

'Cross Season Update

Modder Haan Racing has procured a new RV in the optimistic hope that my feet heal and there will actually be a 'cross season for me this year.  I am feeling better and Captain Agro and I have discussed doing a crit or 3 in an effort to get some intensity in 10 city training under our belts.  Speaking of belts, mine has tightened up 2 holes .... no not the 2 hole, 2 holes ..... and I am as svelte as I have been in years.  In fact, I am 4.2 lbs off my 20 year low so we can reasonably say that should my dogs heal there may be some hope that I can ride a bike faster than the speed of smell.  Could it be my diet?
I doubt that.  Could it be my training?  Definitely not, but the Boss ends the semester of school on Tuesday and Tuesday marks the beginning of my true training, that and my next blood work appointment.  So we shall see.  And seriously, my sore and tired dogs are starting to feel better.  In fact, I got them in a pair of running shoes yesterday for the 1st time since the injury, virus, whathaveyou reared its ugly last September.  Yup, that long.  So let's just suffice it to say that my dogs are flying.
Off for a huge dump and the Marin Velo Ride.


Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Make Sure You Get Your Protein

Got out today.  Felt good, not as good as Peter Sagan.  That man is making the rest of the peloton look like children.  Crushing fools.  And I was watching the Giro coverage on the computer at work and with 200m to go it froze, does every day; what a fucking piece of shit.  Guess maybe work at work would be better and a little, um, more Karmic-ally sound - so to speak.  Trust me, I work at work; plenty. 
Photo Credit to whomever is mentioned in the lower left corner of the pic.

I was up late the other night watching the Lifetime Movie Channel and saw the minx above.  She was a school teacher banging one of her students.  I never had a teacher that looked like that.  Well, my public speaking teacher in college was 26 and smoking hot and called me on Christmas vacation and I think she liked me but I was weak and a sissy back then.  Some chances do get missed I guess.  Oh well.


Sunday, May 13, 2012

Satan, Get Thee Behind Me ...

... and staaaaaaaaaaaart fucking.  Just kidding.  I don't swear.  Happy Mother's Day.  Made some tainted eggs benedict for the boss this morning and we both shat our brains out but, and there is always a but, we did lose a few quick and ugly pounds.  I sneaked a dang ride in, too.  There was this Plecostomus sucking my rear wheel into the wind out LVR so I shook him off like the last few drops of urine on my wanger.   I hate wheel suckers almost as much as those last few drops in my pants. Bitch.  He may have been cool, too, but I had the Sony Walkman on and I wouldn't have know even if he had said, "Sir,with your fine blue ass, those lovely hams in your chamois, may I please sit behind you and breath in the deep essence of your ass while I struggle and try to look cool all while failing miserably and watching your awesomeness ride me right off your fucking wheel without even trying?"  Yeah, I bet that's how it happened.
  So yesterday I was see-sawing.....and I saw that awesome bird above.  No.  No.  No.  Two up.  Two up.      The Great Horned Owl that chills in the tree in my backyard.  Now that, my fine feathered friends, is a real dang yardbird.  What you got?  Thought so.  Weak game.  And I will leave you this fine Sunday with two bits of info: Ryder Hesjedal the dude wearing pink in the Giro d'Italia, yeah him, I have lined up on the same line with that cat only on a mountain bike.  I only saw his rear for about as long as that poor douche saw mine today but ..... seeing pro ass is way better than sniffing amateur ass.  And two: this lovely gal with legs like 9 feet long tagged along with me for a few today as well.  And,well, you can imagine what I might have to say about that ......


Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Time Has a Funny Way of Doing That ... Changing Things

I was this close.  Really.  And then the good doctor tells me there is nothing mechanically wrong with my feet.  It is systematic.  I have an infection, virus, disease, something along those lines.  Could simply be rheumatoid arthritis.  Could be Lyme disease.  Could be Lupus.  Could be anything.  On to more blood work.
So now my head is swirling with possibilities, with demons.
And then there was the ride.  Rough. A little dry.  But oh so worth it in the end.


Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Just A Man With A Dream, And A Good Woman Who Loves Me

See Nikki, the Nicasio Monsta in the picture above?  She's not quite as famous as Nessie but ... and there is always a but, she is out there.  I believe.  Oh, yeah, I only have 3 and 1/2 more weeks of kid duty and then the intervals begin ... in earnest.  I did give today's ride a real go and it was humbling.  But then again, I do have my  follow up with the Good Dr. one week from today so those plans could be derailed.  We shall see.  
Fairy rings are awesome, see them all the time on my new loop: LVR, Ink Wells dirt road, Sam P, PBRoad,     Nicasio reservoir, LVR and home - 48 mile loop which takes me 2:30:00.  Awesome ride.  Been getting out  on Sundays for some good beach miles with the Marin Velo Club.  I am a member.  Sweet kit, too.
That's me on the right climbing up the backside out of Bolinas.  Well, time to jam out with my clam out.